Musings on the Laundry Hamper

This is my laundry hamper:

Lovely, isn’t it? It is big enough to hold the dirty laundry of 3 people. It is wooden, so no delicates can snag on little pieces of wicker. It is sturdy, not one of those flimsy fabric or nylon ones that collapse if you throw a sock in. The lid doubles as seat or side table, according to your needs. I painted it to match the decor of the bathroom.

The perfect laundry hamper, you say?

Let’s have a look at the floor next to it:

I have only one question: WHY????

Neither son nor husband can explain why they prefer to dump their worn clothes on the floor right next to the receptacle specifically designed to harbor such items.

Since it is not really that difficult to lift the lid and deposit dirty laundry into a hamper, I have given this phenomenon thorough thought and came up with the following explanations:

1. The hamper is not high-tech enough for men

2. They like the sound of falling clothes

3. It is proof that they, in fact, changed into clean clothes

4. It is a proud display of how dirty white socks can become during the course of a day

5. It is a ‘subtle’ reminder for me to do laundry

6. They don’t want to get the inside of the hamper dirty

7. There was a towel on the lid, so they couldn’t open it

8. The tile floor is too cold on bare feet, so they cover it with soft fabric

9. It is a piece of modern art that I don’t ‘get’

10. The clothes are not dirty dirty and may be used again (which leaves the question why they didn’t make it back into the closet)

11. My loving husband and son do not want to deprive me of the endless joy and enchantment I get out of touching smelly socks and sweaty shirts

12. They have an irrational fear of whatever might jump out of the hamper if they open it

But I think the real reason is part of a devious plan to drive me out of my mind, just like putting dirty dishes into the sink instead of right into the dishwasher